The
Wisdom of Living
by Chad Lilly
I am an intelligent man, but only time will tell
if I am wise. While I've acquired the knowledge that can be gathered from
books, life experiences, and intuitive contemplation, I'm only beginning
to realize how much I don't know about the wisdom of living.
See, intelligence is merely information; it's just data, facts, figures---the
'what' and 'how' of life. And this has always been the area of study to
which I've been drawn. An early affinity toward books led me to appreciate
the value of learning this information, these facts, and given an innate
ability to recall almost everything I see, hear, and read ... gathering
and retaining information is a simple task for me.
And from an early age, I saw how those around me responded to my intelligence.
From adults complimenting my mother on what a 'sharp' boy she had, to
my grade school teachers advising that I be moved 3 years ahead of my
class ... quickly I learned that knowing these things, this information,
was an obvious benefit.
I found any sport rather simple to master: I just learned the information
required to produce the result, and then I practiced it until I was better
than my opponent ... and I won. No matter if it was 3 meter spring board
diving, wrestling, football, cross country, or chess, my formula for success
proved effective. And given that fact that I'm 5' 6" tall and weigh
130 lbs. soaking wet, I find it difficult to believe this has little to
do with my physical size. (pun intended)
Being intelligent continued to serve me well into my working years, no
matter the job. It was still the same simple game to me: Learn what works,
and then do it better than the guy in front of you, and you win. I attended
speed school for a degree in real estate sales, and at the age of 22 passed
my realtors licensing exam in 3:43 mins. This exam is the equal to the
BAR exam for Law, but for real estate, and students are allowed 6 hours
to complete it. And even after a 9 month course, 3 times per week, 3 hours
per class, only 10% pass it the first time.
After being in real estate for just over a year, I was recruited by a
friend into an international marketing company to manage and train sales
teams. And there I learned that being intelligent was only half of the
battle. The 40th highest paid person in the United States at that time
was Bill Gouldd, and he was the founder of Equinox International.
I learned more 'information' in my first 3 months with Bill Gouldd about
people, than from all the previous books, schools, people, friends, or
family I'd ever known. During that time, I was able to train and manage
a sales team which produced over $20,000 a month in sales for the company,
and paid me close to 24% of it. I was 24 years old, and once again, it
seemed that being intelligent, and knowing things, seemed to produce my
desired result of 'winning'.
One day Bill said, "Chad, you are an intelligent guy, how's that
working out for ya?" I didn't really know how to respond, and since
he sounded as if he was asking a rhetorical question (which I knew better
than to answer) ... I waited. Yet, Bill said nothing. And so I got a little
irritated, and finally said, "We'll, my sales team turned over $20,000
this month for your company ... so I'd say my being intelligent is working
out great for the both of us."
And then Bill said something that I will never forget, something so wise
that, to this day, I'm still trying to fully understand and integrate
into my life:
"Chad, people don't give a damn about what you know, they only care
how you make them feel."
He explained how people like people whom they consider to be like themselves
... and when someone comes along with more information, this makes them
feel inferior and they will dislike you ... rather than admire your intelligence.
And Bill was right. There have been so many times in
my life when I was 'right', according to the information, yet 'lost' because
my 'being right' caused a separation between myself and those with whom
I've spoke ... when agreement is what I sought.
I even became angry at the whole idea that people care more about how
they feel, than what they know. After all ... is this attitude not what
keeps humanity locked in the dark of our own ignorance? Why not applaud
new information, even if it be contrary to our current understanding ...
is this not how we progress? The exchange of outdated information for
new revelations has always been the design of our human evolution, and
has it not worked?
If you are freezing in the cold of night, and I bring
you this new information called: Fire ... would you marvel at the new
discovery, embrace the knowledge of it and enjoy the benefits it brings
... or dislike me for showing you something that you didn't know? The
truth has proven to be the latter, rather than the former, and to this
day, I am still trying to understand why.
I hope one day to become wise enough to consider how my intelligence makes
others feel, rather than how my information might improve their lives,
because I can see that 'people don't give a damn about what you know,
they only care how you make them feel', and while I am an intelligent
man, only time will tell if I am wise.
Chad Lilly is the Founder of InnerCircle
Publishing, Author of: A Day in the Mind, uncommon
sense, evergreen dreams, and Host of Aware
Talk Radio.
For more information about and from
Chad Lilly, follow him on Twitter here: http://twitter.com/awaretalkradio
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